Goodbye, Small Town USA

This is a sign to move out of your hometown, start over, and enjoy life where no one knows you.

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This is exactly what I did. Well, sorta. Sit down, I'll tell ya what happened.

I can't say that my frontal lobe wasn't developed before this time, but sadly, it wasn't connecting my brain to my lower extremities to move fast enough. I first wanted to leave my hometown in 2016. Fucking 2016. It's embarrassing, girl.

I can't remember why it took me so long to get the hell out of there. Life happens fast. And I wasn't moving fast enough at all.

But for some reason, a little before my 31st birthday, I had had enough. I no longer felt comfortable in my own space. My small apartment felt like an unwanted attachment, and my daily interactions with my friends and family felt like a merry-go-round. I was stuck in a world of the same hellos and goodbyes. I was going crazy. Something just clicked.

Now when you hyperfixate as I do, you get busy right away romanticizing your life and doing research. I became obsessed which grew faster than your fear. I used that energy to my advantage. I began logging all of the possible opportunities and outcomes of different areas, pay rates, and scenarios.

Around this time I was overdosing on self-help books and content. Jay Shetty audio from YouTube became my bible. It was very important to me not only to leave physically but mentally as well. I wanted a whole new mindset. I didn't want to be the same. I was so afraid of bringing old habits on to destroy my new world, that I couldn't let ME get me.

I gave myself a year to get it together, no more games and last-minute reasons why it couldn't work. I started my first journal entry of that year; 'This is day one of my personal revolution.' I wrote manifestation mantras all over the page--

I already have what I need and what I want

I already have what I need and what I want

I already have what I need and what I want

Did I believe that? No. See? Confidence girl! Confidence! It's important. Drink the Kool-Aid!

Work life though, got worse. I was miserable being around people who were so happy in the very trap I realized I was in. Having to be performative to fund my exit, was a hell in its own hell. And when you're just not the ass-kissing type, good luck.

I shared my ideas of leaving with a few friends and associates. A lot of people looked at me as crazy for wanting to "randomly move" as they called it. They would say:

'Do you even know anyone there?'

'What gave you this idea?'

'Your crazy, I could never do that'

Upon closer observation, a recurring pattern became evident to me. It struck me how numerous individuals tend to settle into roles and positions that do not truly align with their skills, passions, or potential. This phenomenon raises questions about the factors influencing such complacency and the implications it might have on personal growth and professional development.

This was one of my biggest fears, further stagnation. I feel like I have done that enough. I kept my head down and saved money for a whole year, mapping my move the entire time. Sure, I was afraid. What if things don't go as planned? What if I didn't like it? What if I can't land a job? These same questions and concerns are what kept me where I was in the first place, I couldn't let it stop me again. So many people around me had almost imaginary obligations and superficial ties to a certain area based upon fear, I couldn't let it be me.

When I finally settled on an area and arrived, it was a 'Waiting to Exhale' type moment. The pure luxury of knowing no one, knowing not what was around the corner was somewhat freeing. I had been controlling every aspect of my own life, it felt great to have the pure aesthetic of an area speak for itself, unplanned, unmapped. Natures kiss. I was utterly enamored with the thought that I was not recognized, I had a new identity. I could be anybody. It was my very own blank page. I didn't feel judged. I didn't feel partial to the memory I had once before. 'Just the freedom was better than breathing they said.' (Lupe Fiasco)

In a state of naturalness, I found myself mentally at ease, free from constraints and limitations. This sense of relaxation allowed my thoughts to flow freely, unencumbered by stress or tension. It was a state of mind where I felt in harmony with my surroundings, embracing a sense of calm and tranquility. I experienced a profound sense of liberation and clarity, enabling me to approach life with a renewed sense of vigor and purpose.

It was my own decision. A thought, actualized.

My advice will always be, just do it. Embrace the imperfections, welcome the challenges, and remember that life truly begins at the end of your comfort zone.

You really gotta move like everything is working in your favor, because it is.

Do it.

5 tasks you need to complete before relocating

1. Budget. Figure out your ultimate budget before leaving. What does your ideal lifestyle look like? How much would it take to have that come into fruition? Start a savings account and build a financial goal

2. The Surroundings you are considering are also crucial. Will you be relocating to a colder or warmer climate? A city or the countryside? The general look and feel of the area you are planning to move to are significant factors to consider. They greatly influence your lifestyle and preferred living environment.

3. This also relates to Transportation. Do you have a means of transportation available? Is it necessary to acquire one? Are there walking or public transportation options in the area you are relocating to? Do highways complicate the commute to work? Is it convenient for your daily requirements?

4. Employment is likely one of the major concerns. Can your current job be transferred, or are you considering a different type of job for your relocation? How financially rewarding is this new job in your new location? Are there numerous opportunities available? Is it conveniently located? This decision could be crucial for your move.

5. In conclusion, do you have a Support System? Are you connected to friends or family who could assist you when necessary? You might prefer solitude, which is fine. Seeking help may not be your initial instinct. You could be an expert. However, having someone close to you does offer its benefits.