Entry 9847:
First quarter: My upcoming step will be my greatest. I must have faith in that. It's merely an illusion until it succeeds. While I crave the control, I think I require, the future remains uncertain yet concentrated. The place I wish to avoid is more frightening than what's behind the door of tomorrow. Everything does not have to be perfect. Everything does not have to be perfect. Repeating it helps. Keeping promises to myself makes me feel more powerful and destined. It's something about the self-follow-up that is therapeutic for me. I feel like a different person, a happier being. I have to keep this going. I think about the fruits of my labor frequently. Moving future imaginary money around, solo trips and investments, I could really just fall asleep dreaming in my mind.
"Nothing changes, if nothing changes"

Breaking news
While I don't view myself as your stereotypical "shy", I still get social anxiety that makes me feel like it could hold back opportunities for me. Advocating for myself isn't the issue, but proper expression, verbal organization of ideas, and adhering to different audiences I would love to be more skilled in. Expanding my vocabulary, and affective video online presence are goals of mine. Sometimes I get this bug in my head like, "Who even gives a fuck, right?'
Girl, I do, and I don't want to. Getting more comfortable with myself is a strange journey because, it has so many layers and levels. Sometimes, don't wait for moments, seek possibilities. Life is better when you figure out that your worth is not a group decision. I'm figuring it out.
Just found out that nobody cares, what a relief!

Today In my room

I've been engaging with this book, actually listening to it. It's an excellent read! It contains a wealth of valuable insights for someone like me, a novice real estate agent. I really enjoy how she narrates her journey to fame and influence. Up to this point, I've gained knowledge about positive reinforcement, choosing your circle, mindful thinking, and marketing. It has sparked my thoughts on my initial steps, my optimal steps.
I've been deeply engaging with this book, actually immersing myself in the experience of listening to it through an audiobook format. It's an excellent read, filled with captivating narratives and practical advice! The author has crafted a compelling story that not only chronicles her journey to fame and influence but also serves as a guide for those of us who are just starting out in the real estate industry. As a novice real estate agent, I find the insights shared within the pages to be incredibly valuable and applicable to my own career path.

Day 1: 'What Would you do if you could not fail?'
This question is so loaded because, wow? Having the ability to never fail? Just imagine the profound implications of such a power. The concept of failure is often seen as a significant barrier to personal growth and development. If one were granted the ability to never fail, it would fundamentally alter the landscape of ambition and achievement. The fear of failure, which often paralyzes individuals and prevents them from pursuing their dreams, would simply evaporate. Instead, there would be an unbounded freedom to explore, innovate, and take risks without the looming shadow of potential setbacks. This would not only transform individual lives but could also reshape entire industries and societies. A lot of my insecurities about having inadequate education, background, and influence to succeed would cease to exist. The burden of feeling unqualified or unworthy would be lifted, allowing me to fully embrace opportunities that I might have otherwise shied away from. This ability to never fail would create a safe space for exploration and experimentation, enabling me to delve into various fields without the paralyzing fear of making mistakes. I could take bold steps into new territories, whether that be in the arts, sciences, or any other domain that piques my interest. There would not be monetary stress or societal pressures to perform, which often dictate the choices we make in our careers. Instead, I could pursue what truly resonates with me, unencumbered by the constraints of financial insecurity or the expectations of others. I would become a video journalist most likely. This career path aligns perfectly with my innate curiosity and desire to understand the human experience on a deeper level. I have always been more interested in the intricate workings of individuals – what makes people tick, why they are the way they are emotionally and psychologically, and what took place in their lives to lead up to the events they experience. As a video journalist, I would have the opportunity to explore these narratives, to ask the hard questions, the ones people never thought of, and to uncover the stories that lie beneath the surface. I would engage with diverse communities, capturing their experiences and perspectives, and shining a light on the complexities of human life. This role would not only satisfy my curiosity but also allow me to contribute to a broader understanding of society, fostering empathy and connection through storytelling.


BEGINNING OF 3RD SEMESTER! So those who don't know, I attend community college for an Associates in Health Information Technology. It's been a real journey. I'd first like to say, fuck that Statistics class. I hated it. Passed it with a 77, bye. My Student Advisor has me taking a Science CORE class, so I chose Concepts of Biology. (Tell me if that's bad please!) Medical Terminology, and Health Information Statistics. Yes, another statistics class. Get me outta here.
1/22/25
GIRL!
It's bad! So let me kneel down and show you all the hats that I'm wearing. So far, school isn't not HORRIBLE, but it has definitely gotten hotter in the college kitchen. I'm RETAKING my Advanced Computer Applications class (sorry mama)
The class isn't hard it's just so tedious, and my brain was going to explode by the end of it. So, to me, it was die or fail. lmao. My biology class is different. I guess, biology is biology, not my favorite, it's a class ladies and gentlemen. Ok honey, now this Health Information Statistics class, scared. Its accelerated and totally new and confusing for me. It makes me cry. My Medical Terminology class is taught by the same Professor that instructed my Anatomy & Physiology class, so it is chill, fun, and simple to understand. Overall, 1 out of 10, would not recommend. But securing a degree and job security is still the goal and purpose, so here I go.
Career dreams
&
Glowing Pains
Do I need to hook up the land line because WHAT IS MY CALLING?!

Help! I'm escaping medical burnout and trying to break into different avenues of success. Is this you too? Since realizing doing direct patient care was not where I saw myself at long-term, I've been on a steadfast path toward what really piques my interest. Trial and error, every day.
I've been experimenting with different options to discover what truly energizes me.

Update.
(Pretend I inserted a deep breath before saying all of this, because frankly my mind is everywhere)
So I am currently back on my night shift. (I know) But check this out, I would still need it to set some type of stepping stone for my exit. Gotta bite it and swallow it. Boohoo but oh well type of thing you know?
THEN, I was searching for brokerages earlier this week to kickstart that. Along side, another blog endeavor? Girl hold on, I know, I know. As well as paying for these code academy courses.
This is the product of ADHD, procrastination-carch up time, and over extending myself. BUT BUT BUT I figure if i schedule it all out and take bites of everything and go slow it will all pan out? Wow, I feel like Team Rocket blasting off again.

Options?
Job Available to me after graduation
Degree: Health Information Technology (AOS)
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Health information technician
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Medical coder
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Health services administrator
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Clinical informaticist
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Systems analyst
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IT analyst
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Programmer analyst
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Analytics consultant
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Director of Health Information Technology (IT) Planning and Operations
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Education and Training Director
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Electronic Medical Records (EMR) Director
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Health Information Exchange Integration Analyst
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Health Information Management Exchange Specialist
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Information Management Specialist
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Information Technology Auditor
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Knowledge Management Specialist